Embrace Your Craziness
January 18, 2011 § Leave a comment
”Writing is a form of therapy; sometimes I wonder how all those, who do not write, compose, or paint can manage to escape the madness, the melancholia, the panic fear, which is inherent in the human condition.” – Graham Greene
I struggle with this everyday — my inner craziness (the madness, fear and melancholia). My inner desires to just not give a damn about work, bills or any other ‘responsible’ thing in this world and to just live. To just enjoy this world within which I exist – to be wrapped up in nature, to see the ‘real world’ without being so wrapped up in it, to just be. I wish for that every single day. Does that make me crazy? Does it make me bonafide nuts for wishing for something more than this reality? For pressing for something more alive and real than this falsified reality we live in — one in which we run after jobs we don’t care about, we get dressed up for people we don’t care about and we wear clothes we don’t fit at all because we are terrified of what “they” are going to think???
Am I nuts for being terrified to end up just doing what everyone else does? Am I off the deep end for sometimes wanting to run away from it all — all the expectations, desires and needs of everyone else? Am I naïve for wanting people to be more than just drones? Am I? If I am, then this is why I write. I write to keep myself from suffocating in this world…I write to keep me from being drowned out by the cacophony of this world. I write to breathe.
And if all of that makes me nuts, good. The closer I get to nuts, the more solid I feel within myself. Toast to embracing my craziness.