To be right or not to be….that is indeed the question…

September 27, 2008 § Leave a comment


I just finished watching the first debate between Senator Barack Obama and Senator John McCain. And I thought to myself how convinced each of them is in believing that he is indeed the best and right choice to become the next President of the United States of America. I have, up until the point of the debate tonight, never quite understood how anyone could seriously believe that John McCain is the best choice for this country. And although none of his talking points convinced me of his capability to be the next President – I did realize how convicted he truly is of his ‘purported’ ability to be the best next President. 

And then, in further reflection of the strength of one’s convictions and worldviews, I had a debate of my own with some colleagues. I learned a few things from my debate. First, a debate always goes much better when there is a moderator because there is always someone there to (at least try) keep the debaters on track and not veer off course and make the debate into a lot of other issues. Secondly, attacking another person’s character in a debate is never the way to a) win an argument/debate nor is it the way to b) maintain good relations between people. Lastly, I realize that a debate only continues on when at least one of the parties is determined to “be right” in whatever fashion one can appear to be right. 

I have freshly walked away from this debate, and although I told the individual a very emphatic “fuck you”, I am surprisingly calm. LOL…it is quite funny to think about it now. I do not feel offended, hurt, or even angered — I simply understand that sometimes being right is more important than anything else in life – for some people.

However, I have grown up perceiving the detrimental effects of always striving to be right, always striving to have the last word, always striving to make oneself appear superior. I have seen love lost, tempers flare up, and personalities bruised long after the debate/argument has passed on. I have seen that often times, being right is not important enough as relationships with people in your life. That sometimes, being right is indeed extremely important and is enough to sacrifice several things for. If I believed in protecting my family, I would do everything in my power to protect my family in spite of what others may think, in spite of what others may not deem as right for their lives. However, I do not believe life needs all of that drama for me to strive to always be right — it is just not that important to me. If you are right all the time, then fine, you are all right all of the time. But then you are probably all alone too. 

And this is not to say that I do not enjoy being alone…in fact, I love having my alone time away from all those who know me and care for me. However, I also understand the magnitude of social relationships upon human beings. We need these social relationships just as plants need water and sunlight. So, is it important to me to always be right? I have to say an emphatic no. However, there are some individuals in this world who believe that being right is much much more important than anything else. I guess that is where we fundamentally disagree, huh? lol…

Convictions, worldviews, perspectives….all of these definitely do affect us, don’t they? It is what makes us human, it is what makes us unique, it is what makes us beautiful in each of our own ways. I thank God for these differences — I truly do. However, I do not tolerate disrespect in any form whether or not that disrespect is a reflection of another’s God-given differences or just some psychological hang-up — which is what led to the emphatic “fuck you”…hahaha. 

Sometimes the question is indeed whether or not it is worth it to be right or to not be right. Or maybe the better question is what does one decide is the platform upon which to be right — on the issue being debated? on the future of one’s relationships? on the desire to avoid confrontation? on the desire for a inflammatory debate? or just on the desire to always be right? 

We all make choices, we all have priorities, and we all decide when it is truly important to each of us to be right…..definitely a loaded question indeed.

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